Excuses for Not Drinking: 51 Ways to Say No to Alcohol
Don't Feel Like Drinking? That's Alright!
I never did start drinking alcohol and don’t really have any reason to start, so I’ve collected quite a few excuses for not drinking over the years. I thought I’d share 51 of my favorites in case you might be looking for some ways to say no to alcohol.
Even if you do like to drink, these can come in handy from time to time!
51 Excuses for Not Drinking Alcohol
- I don’t drink.
- I’m driving.
- I’m allergic.
- Thanks, but do you have any Ovaltine?
- I’m on a hunger strike.
- Who do you think I am? Ms. Sant? Drinkin’ out of cups?
- I’m diabetic.
- See that dude over there? He’s drinking for the both of us. Just send drinks his way.
- I’m on a diet.
- No thanks.
- I’m pregnant.
- I’m the designated driver.
- I’m trying to pace myself.
- I’m fasting.
- It’ll make me too sleepy.
- None for me, thanks!
- I’ll pass.
- Thanks, but I never combine alcohol with meth.
- I’m not thirsty.
- I’m still drunk from last night.
- “Sorry, I like to be difficult.”
- I’m feeling a bit queasy right now. Probably not a good idea.
- I’ve got to give up really early tomorrow.
- I’m Mormon.
- I can’t have it with my medication.
- I’m a recovering alcoholic.
- Pass! Pass! Pass! OHAAAYO!!
- I’m trying to cut back.
- I’m already feeling a bit tipsy.
- I can’t.
- No thanks, I’m still digesting that napkin.
- Thanks, but I promised my boyfriend I’d not embarrass him tonight.
- I’m in the middle of a detox, but thanks.
- I’m still hungover.
- Thanks for the offer, but I only drink Laings Ben Ewe Whisky.
- I’m too broke to be drinking right now.
- Last time I drank, I got in this epic bar fight... I promised myself not to drink again until the bruises heal.
- I’m not big on the taste, but thanks.
- Thanks, but all I want right now is a glass of warm milk. And a blankie.
- Whoah—ok, GREAT. Now you’ve reminded me how bad I have to go pee.
- Not a good idea. I’m an angry drunk.
- GO AWAY.
- I gave booze up for lent.
- It’s against my religion.
- I’m training really hard right now—no alcohol for me.
- I’m a vampire.
- I already have to go pee... this’ll just do me in.
- I had a terrible experience with alcohol a while back... Still recovering from it.
- And how am I supposed to measure those calories?
- LOOK! A marmoset!
Why Skimp on Drinks?
Not sure why you would want to turn down drinks at a party? Here are some compelling reasons:
- If you're not buying drinks, you can save a lot of money.
- You will probably not end up hungover the next morning.
- You will probably not end up vomiting somewhere.
- You will be less likely to make a fool of yourself.
- You will be able to safely drive home—and even act as the all-important designated driver.
- You can spare yourself the absorption of empty calories.
- You will better be able to watch others get wasted.
Have Your Say!
Do you drink?
What's Your Go-To Excuse?
If you ever pass on drinks at a party or social event, what is your excuse? Share it with the rest of us in the comments! I know I'm always looking for something new to say, and I bet you've got some great ideas!
© 2011 Simone Haruko Smith