What do I do if, as a bridesmaid, I can’t afford the dress that the bride or groom has picked out?

Answer

Often, and I don’t want to say always, because I know that’s not the case, brides and grooms are receiving financial help from their immediate family to help fund their wedding. This is not so for the bridal party! If your bride or groom has picked out a dress that’s far beyond your budget, you need to be honest with them and let them know. Before bringing anything up with the bride or groom, find out if the store that the dress is from offers payment plans, but never go into debt for a dress you’re going to wear one time (and I said it in this article, and I’ll say it again, you will never wear the dress again).

If that’s not the case, you’ll have to let the betrothed know and ask if there are any other options and if not you should bow out of the wedding. I know that might seem drastic, but my logic here is that if you can’t afford the outfit they’ve picked out for you to wear on the day of, then you also can’t afford to contribute to all of the parties, dinners, and celebrations that’ll take place before the wedding either. Just let them know in a non-confrontational, non-blaming way. Say something like “Hey, it really means a lot to me that you invited me to a part of your wedding and I don’t take the responsibility lightly which is why I need to let you know I can’t afford to be a bridesmaid and still fulfill my responsibilities. You deserve to have someone standing with you that can be there for you in all ways and it saddens me to say that I can’t do that.”

One thing you should never do is ask the bride or groom to pay for the dress. It’s just not appropriate, even if it’s a close friend or family member.

Your bride or groom should respond in a graceful way or even offer a way for you to be a part of things without breaking you financially. That’s what good friends do. Unfortunately, people aren’t always good friends when they’re planning their wedding and you can’t hold their dreams for their big day against them. Be kind, they’ll probably be upset but you should always reply in a kind way that doesn’t put the blame on them or create more tension than is necessary. Not being able to afford a friend’s wedding is a bummer but in the scheme of life, this is of low importance and chances are you’re not the only one struggling to meet the financial demands of the impending wedding.

Updated on May 17, 2018

Original Article:

What Does a Bridesmaid Even Do?
By Kierstin Gunsberg
working

This website uses cookies

As a user in the EEA, your approval is needed on a few things. To provide a better website experience, holidappy.com uses cookies (and other similar technologies) and may collect, process, and share personal data. Please choose which areas of our service you consent to our doing so.

For more information on managing or withdrawing consents and how we handle data, visit our Privacy Policy at: "https://holidappy.com/privacy-policy#gdpr"

Show Details
Necessary
HubPages Device IDThis is used to identify particular browsers or devices when the access the service, and is used for security reasons.
LoginThis is necessary to sign in to the HubPages Service.
Google RecaptchaThis is used to prevent bots and spam. (Privacy Policy)
AkismetThis is used to detect comment spam. (Privacy Policy)
HubPages Google AnalyticsThis is used to provide data on traffic to our website, all personally identifyable data is anonymized. (Privacy Policy)
HubPages Traffic PixelThis is used to collect data on traffic to articles and other pages on our site. Unless you are signed in to a HubPages account, all personally identifiable information is anonymized.
Amazon Web ServicesThis is a cloud services platform that we used to host our service. (Privacy Policy)
CloudflareThis is a cloud CDN service that we use to efficiently deliver files required for our service to operate such as javascript, cascading style sheets, images, and videos. (Privacy Policy)
Google Hosted LibrariesJavascript software libraries such as jQuery are loaded at endpoints on the googleapis.com or gstatic.com domains, for performance and efficiency reasons. (Privacy Policy)
Features
Google Custom SearchThis is feature allows you to search the site. (Privacy Policy)
Google MapsSome articles have Google Maps embedded in them. (Privacy Policy)
Google ChartsThis is used to display charts and graphs on articles and the author center. (Privacy Policy)
Google AdSense Host APIThis service allows you to sign up for or associate a Google AdSense account with HubPages, so that you can earn money from ads on your articles. No data is shared unless you engage with this feature. (Privacy Policy)
Google YouTubeSome articles have YouTube videos embedded in them. (Privacy Policy)
VimeoSome articles have Vimeo videos embedded in them. (Privacy Policy)
PaypalThis is used for a registered author who enrolls in the HubPages Earnings program and requests to be paid via PayPal. No data is shared with Paypal unless you engage with this feature. (Privacy Policy)
Facebook LoginYou can use this to streamline signing up for, or signing in to your Hubpages account. No data is shared with Facebook unless you engage with this feature. (Privacy Policy)
MavenThis supports the Maven widget and search functionality. (Privacy Policy)
Marketing
Google AdSenseThis is an ad network. (Privacy Policy)
Google DoubleClickGoogle provides ad serving technology and runs an ad network. (Privacy Policy)
Index ExchangeThis is an ad network. (Privacy Policy)
SovrnThis is an ad network. (Privacy Policy)
Facebook AdsThis is an ad network. (Privacy Policy)
Amazon Unified Ad MarketplaceThis is an ad network. (Privacy Policy)
AppNexusThis is an ad network. (Privacy Policy)
OpenxThis is an ad network. (Privacy Policy)
Rubicon ProjectThis is an ad network. (Privacy Policy)
TripleLiftThis is an ad network. (Privacy Policy)
Say MediaWe partner with Say Media to deliver ad campaigns on our sites. (Privacy Policy)
Remarketing PixelsWe may use remarketing pixels from advertising networks such as Google AdWords, Bing Ads, and Facebook in order to advertise the HubPages Service to people that have visited our sites.
Conversion Tracking PixelsWe may use conversion tracking pixels from advertising networks such as Google AdWords, Bing Ads, and Facebook in order to identify when an advertisement has successfully resulted in the desired action, such as signing up for the HubPages Service or publishing an article on the HubPages Service.
Statistics
Author Google AnalyticsThis is used to provide traffic data and reports to the authors of articles on the HubPages Service. (Privacy Policy)
ComscoreComScore is a media measurement and analytics company providing marketing data and analytics to enterprises, media and advertising agencies, and publishers. Non-consent will result in ComScore only processing obfuscated personal data. (Privacy Policy)
Amazon Tracking PixelSome articles display amazon products as part of the Amazon Affiliate program, this pixel provides traffic statistics for those products (Privacy Policy)